There are Zombie races, Zombie dances, Zombie flash mobs and movie star Zombies. The opening episode for the Zombie TV series The Walking Dead was the most watched episode of any TV drama – ever. In short, Zombies are hot.
Which is bad news for me, because Zombies gross me out. And
if they are doing their job, that’s how I’m supposed to feel.
Most people inherently opposed to Zombies can go on to live
completely normal lives, with little or no risk of random Zombie run-ins. Not
so much when you live in Salem, MA- the Halloween capitol of the world, where
the popularity of Zombies have turned my hometown into The Night of the Living
Dead.
Out for an evening run? Watch out for Zombies! Walking to the downtown drugstore in the dark? High Zombie alert! And my fear of a skunk attack as I’m putting out the trash has been replaced by my fear of Zombie walk-bys on their way to or from the train. In fact, it seems there is nothing I can do in Salem at night in October that doesn’t involve confronting my fear of the walking dead.
Out for an evening run? Watch out for Zombies! Walking to the downtown drugstore in the dark? High Zombie alert! And my fear of a skunk attack as I’m putting out the trash has been replaced by my fear of Zombie walk-bys on their way to or from the train. In fact, it seems there is nothing I can do in Salem at night in October that doesn’t involve confronting my fear of the walking dead.
First let me clarify- I’m not a scaredy cat. I’ve jumped out
of a plane, ridden the highest roller coasters in the country and even lived in
a haunted apartment. And its not so much the fright factor as it is the total
gross out factor.
Perhaps my aversion can be traced back to my childhood when I was much too young to watch the original Night of the Living Dead, when even in black and white I was mesmerized and disgusted at the flesh eating zombies - in particular the little girl who was found snacking on her mom in the cellar.
Perhaps my aversion can be traced back to my childhood when I was much too young to watch the original Night of the Living Dead, when even in black and white I was mesmerized and disgusted at the flesh eating zombies - in particular the little girl who was found snacking on her mom in the cellar.
Plus I don’t have a high tolerance for blood and guts to
begin with. I’m not a potential candidate for nursing school, and it’s a known
fact that I don’t need to hear the details when someone calls in sick, never
mind come face to face with someone pretending half of their head got blown off
just for the fun of it.
And with all the awesome/funny/scary things you could be for Halloween, I don’t understand the desire to be someone who died a violent death, because if you’ve lived long enough, you may actually know people who died that way. So if that makes me a self-righteous Zombie fearing Halloween party pooper, so be it.
So what is a Zombie fearing Salem citizen to do during Halloween?
Wait it out in fear of the 2nd grossest thing I can think of…Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving.
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