Always Be Prepared

The following story is 100% true. My boss walks into my office and says "What a day. I wish I had one of those hand grips that you squeeze to get my frustrations out." "Like this?" I say as I reach over and produce the exact item he is referring to. "Somehow that doesn’t surprise me," he says. "You probably have a slinky, too." "Like this?" I say as I open my drawer and take out a slightly rusty but still operational slinky, to which he just shakes his head and leaves.

First, let me clarify. I am not a hoarder, and you won’t find an episode of me on A & E tearfully asking for help amidst old newspapers and empty milk containers that I cannot part with. In fact, I am obsessively neat and enjoy nothing better than a good spring cleaning where everything that is not needed, not used, not worn and not nailed down goes into the trash. How then have I gotten the reputation of go-to girl for Neosporin, a cash-box, birthday candles, a ponytail holder and a can opener (all of which I was asked for and successfully produced before noon this morning)?

I’m not quite sure, to be honest with you. Perhaps I was inspired by Let’s Make a Deal with Monty Hall, where the host would ask audience members to produce the most random objects imaginable for a cash prize. "I’ll give you $50 if you can show me a red marble", and I would jot down the words RED MARBLE to remind myself that I could possible need that one day- a habit I continue 40 years later. Not a day goes by when I don’t make a note of something I need, want or vow never to get caught without again. I scribble notes at work, at home, on the run and on the road, and start each day transcribing my scraps into a long list, which I meticulously cross off as items are completed. Or perhaps my fear of being unprepared goes back to childhood when I was called out in front of the class for being the only student to not bring an object to Show and Tell- a devastating admonishment for a young child so eager to do the right thing.

Whatever the reason, my ‘always be prepared’ motto has served me well over the years. My list of things not to forget to bring to a marathon is almost as many miles long as the race itself, and my event box that I drag around from function to function is an evolving mix of must need items that no party planner should be without. Yes, the consensus at home, at work and even at play is that if you need something, I’m the person you need to see.

But even the best preparer in the world will one day meet her match, and mine came sitting in my mother’s doctor’s office, as he slowly and carefully explained the test results displayed on the screen. And as I clutched my lucky red marble, it occurred to me that my quirky behavior has been a way of imposing some control in a world where so much is out of my control. And while most things can be anticipated, there are a few we will never truly be prepared for.