There is a hot debate going on right now among some members of my running club, and it concerns the idea of giving all finishers of an event an award as opposed to recognizing only the "winners". Some people believe this "everyone wins by participating" philosophy contributes to a feeling of entitlement, defeating the whole idea of good sportsmanship where you learn to lose (or win) with dignity. Others believe that by rewarding all participants, everyone feels a sense of accomplishment and pride.
While both viewpoints are valid, there is no easy answer. And from personal observation, I’m not so sure it is about the medals or ribbons as much as it is about what is inside each of us. I’ve seen some back-of-the-pack runners of all ages complete their first race bursting with pride they did not need a medal or ribbon to validate, and I’ve seen top finishers so disappointed in their performance that no award could take away the sting of what they considered a personal failure.
Which got me thinking less about the finish, and more about the fact that with all the pressures to win and succeed that bombard us from all sides, it’s a miracle we are strong enough to try at all.
There is something very brave about the act of "trying", whether it is running a race or running for office. Our results oriented, "winning is everything" world can intimidate the faint of heart who are unable to block out the negativity surrounding them. In both the professional and volunteer worlds, the mere mention of a new idea will inevitably elicit a list of potential disasters, suggesting it may be better to not try at all. "What if you can’t do it?" "What if no one comes?" "What if it doesn’t work?" "What if they say no?" "What if its too hard?" "What if you FAIL?" Negativity can paralyze us and leave us stuck in our safety, never knowing what could have been if only we had more faith than fear.
I work in sales, where the fear of trying can literally end a career. This fear was put to the test at the start of my employment with the Boston Herald when I thought it would be a great idea to throw an advertiser party. Who doesn’t love a party? Months of preparation, hours of event planning, and hundreds of invitations later, it was the day of my grand idea. A handful of Herald employees stood with me in the Rotunda at Faneuil Hall surrounded by food for hundreds as we watched a rainstorm pound down upon the city. It was the kind of rainstorm that ties up traffic for miles. The kind of rainstorm that makes you turn around and go home rather than attend a Boston Herald party. My only consolation was that our publisher, was in New York and wouldn’t be present to see this fiasco. "The Publisher just called. He decided to fly in for the party and is on his way from the airport." I quickly did the math on how much the company had spent for this debacle, and it came to somewhere around $80 per shrimp. Just then Pat walked in, not so fresh from his flight and one mile drive from the airport that took him over an hour. He glanced around the room and took in my debut disaster. The words he spoke next, I will never forget. "Tough break on the weather, but thanks for trying," he said "everything doesn’t always work out, but you still have to try. That’s the only way you’ll ever know if it was a good idea or not." Then he ate a shrimp.
That was one of those defining moments when someone has the power to crush you, or lift you up. Thankfully, I got a lift, and I’ve been trying things ever since. While it remains true that not everything has worked out the way I’ve wanted, for every disappointment I’ve endured I’ve also had some really great successes.
Which comes back to the original question. Should everyone who finishes be recognized with a reward for being brave enough to try at all? Ask a marathon runner and see what they say, then ask who has the right to judge which personal accomplishment is greater than another. Awards or not, we all know what is easily within our reach, and what we have to try really hard to achieve. And in that trying, comes the true measure of success.
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